How to help increase your everyday happiness

Although there's no doubt we're born with certain personality traits, experts say much of how we respond to the world around us is learned. While you can't obviously undergo a personality transplant, there are ways to help lessen your anger and sadness. Here are some simple strategies to help improve your everyday happiness.

When you're confronted with a challenging situation, try pausing before you react in your usual way. Look at your choices and choose a more positive response. Life is so much better when we smile than when we frown – and it's easier than you might think to walk away from anger. Here are some ways to boost everyday happiness and improve your heart and emotional health.

A nine-year study of 2,500 men showed that those who bottled up their anger were up to 75 per cent more likely to develop coronary artery disease than those who vented their frustration.

• The next time you're angry, find a friend and let off some steam (but be careful not to create an enemy).

When you count, your brain activity shifts to the frontal cortex, the area of rational thought – and away from the emotionally charged limbic system where there's little control over emotions. That's why you feel more able to cope after counting.

• You can increase the effectiveness by breathing deeply at the same time.

This simple advice is not as trite as it sounds: studies show that feelings of love actually make your heart beat more smoothly and regularly. Conversely, one recent British study showed that an unhappy love life increased the risk of heart disease in women.

• Try doing something each day that makes you feel a warm, loving glow.

As soon as you start feeling angry with a shop clerk, for example, stop and take a mental step back.

• Is the shop's ridiculous refund policy really the cashier's fault? Is it actually fair to expect a student doing a part-time job at the grocery store to know where the pesto sauce is kept?

Anger, frustration and impatience peak when we try to do too many things at once.

• Look at your list of things to do each day and cross out the least important.

This will help you to get into the habit of focusing on what's most important, and stop worrying about the trivial stuff.

One study showed that men with coronary artery disease who were prepared to forgive and forget had improved blood flow to their hearts.

• Harbouring a grudge increases adrenalin levels while destroying the feel-good hormone serotonin.

Forgiveness releases bottled-up anger and creates a healthier hormone balance.

We are often our own harshest critics. While you're trying hard to forgive others, remember to go easy on yourself as well.

• You know you can't change the past, but you can improve the present – and that means being kind to yourself.

When was the last time you had fun? If no recent events spring to mind, it's time to write some fun into your calendar.

• Having "fun" need not be elaborate, just something for you look forward to.

We can't control world events, corporate downsizings, bad weather or the stupid behaviour of other people. Nonetheless, many of us take such happenings personally.

• Learn to let go of circumstances or situations that you can't change without feeling anger or guilt.

Not everything in life can be controlled. But how you approach troublesome or annoying situations will help you boost your overall happiness, which is key to a healthier life.